L D asked:


The 401K has a loan. Will the court make the loan be repaid before making a settlement?

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Rose asked:


Unfortunately, during my fiance’s previous marriage, he co-signed on an auto loan for his then-wife. He made every payment on the account for several years, and maintained insurance on it for her. When he left, he continued this for almost a year. He told her she would have to take over, and warned her five or six times over a three month period that the insurance was going to expire and she needed to renew it in her name. Well, she didn’t, and then she totaled the car. The car was repossessed and sold.

From what I understand (and I won’t go into all the details), I highly doubt they are going to come after my fiance with any gusto. It would basically cost them too much money. However, if we get married, and they then decide to come after him, can they take my income into consideration in settlement proceedings? We do not live in a commonwealth state. I ask because Jay looked into bankrupcy, and the lawyer wanted my income too because we live together. Thanks for your time

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Little Blossom asked:


Our names are both on the loan. He is willing to allow me to buy him out. But I cannot refinance a new loan and be able to afford to buy him out. If we have a notarized contract that states he releases any interest on the home with the address and loan number, in exchage for the lump sum and some of the articles in the house will it be legal as a settlement?
We make an agreement, I keep the loan we have, give him a lump sum to release his repsonibility on the loan and I continue to pay the loan I have.instead of refinancing a new one just to get his name off the mortgage. If we have a contract that is notarized he releases responsiblity of our current loan and I take over payments, is this going to be a legal document is the question?
So far Randy has the best advice!
So far Randy has the best advice!

settlement loan

designerint76 asked:


Ok where to start, Im in a bad place emotionally right now and so in love with my husband I dont know how to stop myself.

About 3 weeks ago I went away for a week with the kids due to where I was camping I could not charge my phone and was unable to talk to my husband for 4 days.

I come home happy and content in life to find out my husband was unhappy in our marriage and the lack of contact did not help. He said that the past 6 months were not good due to me lashing out when I was mad and the lack of communication due to him playing computers 7 days a week 6pm to 12pm at night and spending 3 years on and off going to bed on my own.

The day after my head was all over the place instinct was telling something more serious was going on, I started to grieve feeling my husband was cheating on me and he was going to leave. That day I did something very stupid and tried to take my life, it was only a cry for help. The problem was prior to all of this he decided he wanted to got to amsterdam to visit friends , this is totally out of character for my husband as he as no real life friends, he doesnt drink and is slightly depressive. He plays computer games more specific online games.

This also was playing on my mind when I did what I did, this did not help our situation all week I was up and down emotionally tormenting myself with what I had done. My husband saying I needed mental help and saying I was paranoid. That week I also helped pack his suitcase of which I was suspicious as he had to take his designer clothes and boxers and his aftershave (of which he bought for us!) never the less feeling very insecure I drove him to the airport (ON MY BIRTHDAY!) and off he went. That evening I felt awful, lonely, one birthday card not from him.

After talking to family member I came to the conclusion that he would never cheat on me and started to be positive by setting myself goals, so the next day I looked on his computer for is flight information to set a goal but found an email address that I had not seen before, I managed none the less to get into it to find about 2 months of emails to another woman who he we both met playing online games who concidently lived in amsterdam. They were horrible saying how much they loved each other and other stuff sexually.

To cut along story short I rang him up and confronted, he said that he had’nt done anything he had made that decsion before getting off the plane. All that week we talked and text and came to the conclusion that we were going to work through our problems. Even though he was staying at her parents house. Eventually this led to lust and the best sex we ever had when he came home.

The real problem is he has been home for two weeks and I have been an emotional wreck, I need reassurances and affection, he has been hot and cold with feelings, he now said he loves me but hes not in love with me, that its gonna take time, that I should’nt push him into making a decsion. That it may not work could be a week a month etc.
Just be normal. How can I be normal, I feel rejected and insecure.

He has just controlled the whole thing when ever I try to help or talk about the problems try and fix what I did and help him to mend he clams up any arguement ends in well I can always leave, knowing fine well that I will buckle and start to cry begging him not to because I love him to much. Then another night it will be like nothing has happened, great sex etc etc.

I cant live like this as much as I want this to work and I love him hes my soulmate and Im so frightend of losing him. Anyways yesterday I had enough and asked to move out for a bit so we had time to think.
He did I was calm and collective packed all his stuff up and did the ironing upstairs while he packed the stuff into his dads car.

He kept coming up making idol chit chat and at the end said I suppose you want your ring back I said I didnt want anything just yet then he said you do know Im leaving once im gone im gone. He is being made redundant in 3 weeks and is expecting a payout, I feel he was just waiting for that. Part of me thinks he confused and may come back.

Im scared with have a big mortgage which we have had for 3 years and a secured loan on top, I have a very good job just dont know if I could manage all on my own not to mention being a single parent again.

I cant stop texting him and calling in desperation i love him dearly and want him back mentally. I feel horrible inside im not eating or sleeping, he was always the one when I felt bad that could take my pain away with a hug and a kiss, now I cant get that and it hurts.

I really am messed up.

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gunnmetalblue asked:


My ex wife and I bought a 2004 vehicle when we were still married. We separated in 2006, and have been divorced since 11/07. My name is still on the loan documents, even though the divorce settlement says that she has sole possesion of the car. She is constantly late with the payments, and my credit rating is suffering greatly. How can I go about having the court force her to refinance the vehicle in her name?

settlement loan

MICHAEL C asked:


My wife seldom hit me, but her abuse was nonstop and vicious. She has used her tongue and mind to harm my life in ways an enemy wouldnt even stoop to doing. I have repeatedly demonstrated that I loved this woman more than any man could love, and she used my kind heart, dedication and love to hurt me beyond belief.
To make it clear, I wanted a family so badly, that i married a woman 3000 miles away I met online. I didnt know she was so bad, addicted to Rx drugs, or so very pretty.
1. She called police and said I abused her, after I found out she went to Canada with a rockstar, and a note to another man saying she loved him. Luckily I had entire encounter on tape, and cops didnt arrest me as she asked
2. She filed false divorce documents saying I contributed $3,000, when it was $178,000…She stopped divorce, and we got back together
3. Upon catching her writing other men, she destroyed my computer files containing #1s adultry, so I told her to go home to FL. Weeks later I found out she said I beat her to a doctor and family, making it impossible for me to move in with her.
4. She told me she waned to be a model and singer, then told me she had to write every man on myspace, and put up pix in skimpy outfits. As a Christian, this has hurt my soul. For sake of marriage and love, I said ok to keep her happy, even though it seemed sinful to me.
5. She signed my name for a loan to get plastic surgery, taking this 110lb woman with DD boobs, to a FF.
6. I found this out the day of surgery, as I Iearned she was in Mexico getting procedure done. I flew down to help her get thru surgery, then asked her about loan a few days later upon recovery. We had a fight over that and other guys she was writing, Next day in CA, she destroyed my computer again(contained more of her adultry), then yelled boody murder. Cops came, she was bleeding from surgery. she told them to arrest me on violence. They did, then let me go a few day later without saying a word, cause they didnt believe her.
7. A week later, I got another computer and checked her myspace. She turned it into a sexual dating site, filled with love notes and sexual comments. I got a dui at 8 am next morning.
8. I tell her Im going to file forgery charges, she starts being nice, and we make up. I told her I wouldnt check myspace anymore, cause we just fight too much about the things she writes men. We had 3 good months, until she started being strangely mean. I go onto myspace, and see that she was writing blogs about me beating her. My coworkers were on her friends list and could read these lies. She was telling a country music star she adored him and how hot he was in many letters and comments.
9. Though this is not in sequence, thruout marriage she wrote me about 8000 of the most horrible text imaginable. I still have not read 1,154 of them that are stored on my computer. they were so mean and insane, that I couldnt sleep, was hurting my job performance, and sometimes made me drink. I am a recovering alcoholic and was sober for 10 1/2 years until the night of #1.
10. We seem to make up, I continue sending her about 3/4(800) of my paycheck a week to pay for her house and living. In order to do that, I never bought clothes, made sack lunches and never ate out, stopped playing golf and never had fun. The only thing I bought was clothes for her modeling shoots every week, cameras and gear for photography. I had so many money making inventions and ideas, but only contributed to her modeling dream. The only thing I ever asked my distant wife for, was a 5 minute goodmorning and goodnight call, which she hardly ever did, instead I got about 40 crazy mean text while I was at work.
11. When her text became so absurdedly mean, I quickly took off work and flew to Florida. It took me 3 days to get there tho, cause I had trouble finding a flight I could afford. She learned about it, because she broke into my email(as usual), and saw itenarary. She had time to clean up. Strangely tho, on my 3rd day there, laying beside her bed, I found 4 pix with her and the man from #1 kissing. She was wearing a shirt I bought her, and my ring on wrong finger, so we were married. I was so hurt, because she always said she was faithful, just wrote stupid stuff from nievity. I took pix of pix, showing the date, which was 2 days before I left florida. I didnt tell my wife I found pix until I was at airport entrance. We had a great time together, and she wanted me to stay longer. When i told her about pix, she didnt flinch, make a face, show expression at all. I told her i forgave her, and loved her, all with a kiss and a smile. I told her I wanted to move home though. Half way home, I received a text. thinking it was an apology i was happy. No, she said i was a pervert because I looked thru her kids underwear drawer. they were at dads, and I searched house after i found pix.
12. She was still sending me terrible text, and I was crying. couldnt believe this from a woman who cheated, and I
I am posting a part 2, as it left out worst yet..it was too long to fit
seekn2know, thank you. This may sound strange, but your answer made me smile and cry. I thought I was honoring my vow to God, but strangely enough it has hurt my soul. My late dad was divorced 5 times, and my own personal vow was to do it once. Thanks for the wisdom and setting me straight.

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Bryan asked:


I have recently discovered that my wife is secretly inquiring about divorce with local attorneys (reverse phone search),online research (history on PC)and co-workers (text messaging). I have asked if we are okay, unhappy and she tells me everything is fine. Her text messages are quite clear that she is waiting for the right time, depending on housing and a possible promotion. I have for so long been driving a lemon, she has a nice truck. I want to refinance my house,cash out 6,000 and use it to pay her credit card debt. I also want to purchase a truck. I want to do these things before she files because once she does, I cannot accrue,sell, transfer, redesign or refinance any new property,insurance or financial accounts until the divorce is finalized. Paying off part of credit card debt would be less debt to take to the courts. Once I refinance too, I would have a months period where I have no mortgage paymt. I plan to use that $ to secure an attorney…retainer fee.
there was a time when we shared our cell. It was our only phone, until she sort of hinted that I should get my own. So i did but I was curious as to why she would want this. I searched her text messagin one day and read the following text messages, Once you file, he has 30 days to dispute your terms, but he needs to do this through an attorney. they cost money which you say he doesn’t have. So you win!
Her response (out box), If he stops paying my credit card and the truck he will have the money for one.
Friend’s response,This is why you don’t tell him. Save money in a secret account until you have the money to file your petition.
She already has opened a secret account, but only has 47.00 right now.
On one occasion she forgot to close internet explorer and she was still signed in to her e-mail account. I guess she must have clicked on a link sent to her from a friend and forgot to go back and log out. Anyhow, I read the following from a friend (possible future room mate);
After you serve him you will be req’d to sign an affidavit/financial disclosure form to show the courts you are not hiding any marital assets/property (cash,property, IRA,etc). As long as he doens’t have proof (taxe forms, account statements, summary reports) that you have these things they cannot get you on them. Have your account statements for the checking account you just opened to my apartment. Change the address from your mom’s to here since that’s what going to happen eventually.
It costs me several hundred to file poeple!!!! I am paying 1000 for our mortgage, 460 for her jeep and 217 monthly for her credit cards. I can continue to do this, refinance my home,cash out and :
pay the remaining balance
Get a good used truck, confront her with everything I have and use the rest to file AND secure an attorney. Then i can stop makin payments on her truck and debt and begin paying on my things.

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